turns out, he was the one holding the light at the end of the tunnel

Recently it seems like my friends seem to be plagued with partners, friends, or family that all need to "find themselves". Which, in itself, isn't a bad thing. I think we'll probably all come to a point where we realize that we aren't quite the people we want to be, or at the very least, aren't on the right path to getting there. And finding our way back to that path or person can be a LOT more challenging than you might think.

The crummy part, though, is that these people have felt the need to leave their loved ones in order to find themselves. Like, the fact that those people are around is what's keeping them from being themselves. I honestly can't vouch whether it's true or not, but it got me thinking about my own relationship, and some of the better relationships around me.

And what I think is this: In any good relationship, whether with a lover or friend, when you find yourself lost, you should be able to turn TO that person to help find your way. THEY should be the one to help you find your way. You should NOT feel like they are the ones blocking you...

And if that's the case? I mean, isn't a relationship supposed to be a partnership? And if it isn't, at what most of these people, I'm sure, consider to be the turning points of their lives? Maybe it's not just their sense of self that needs to evolve, but the relationship as well. If anything, I can't help but feel like, if they dealt with the relationship first, a lot of the identity problems would sort themselves out at the same time. I keep thinking how much easier it COULD be to find yourselves if you have someone guiding the way... Not to mention knowing that, if and when you do find yourself, that person will be there to make sure you don't find yourself lost again.

But if you just up and walk away?? Well, maybe that new life is one you need to live alone. But if not, if you want to share the excitement of a new beginning? Well, how easy will it be to lose yourself, once again, when you turn around to realize that in finding yourself, you lost everyone else?

I would love to think that most of my friends have a loved one that they are able to turn to in times of stress and confusion that helps them sort it all out, clear the path, and even provide inspiration for a new and more exciting future BECAUSE they are there, not in spite of their presence... But enough ranting. What do you think?